A Sad Day

Today is a sad day, I found out my boss is getting a new job. This might sound like a strange reason to be sad but you really don't understand what it means to have a boss who lets you get away with murder. Don't get me wrong, I do my job well enough, but he takes such abuse from us in his stride and he's never sacked any of us yet. Some things that SHOULD get you into trouble normally are;

1. If your boss tells you in the queue of a sandwich shop he's staying in tonight and making a cake, shout "GAY" at him.

2. He tells you in meeting that we're £10k short of target, say "£10k? I'll do that spinning on my cock"

3. Ask him if he's a bummer tied to a tree, when he says no, run away shouting "BUMMER ON THE LOOSE!!!"

4. At a sales conference in front of the general manager he says to the team "I want to see you all in my room in 10 minutes" say "Oh no, you won't make us touch your winkie again will you?"

5. If he tells you he's been on a date say "Did you sling one up her?" (This wasn't me by the way, thanks Rich) he says "No, I'm not like that" say in unison "Mmmm, you're definitely gay"

6. Put two bananas up the twin exhaust pipes of his new BMW.

7. Hide dubious magazines in his official sales presentation folder.

8. When he says hello to you in head office, with his manager by his side, introduce yourself and pretend you've only just met him. Even though he's been there for two years.

9. Change the language on his mobile phone to Turkish... actually we do this to everyone.

10. When he's presenting to an important group, sit behind the important group and make dim crossed eyed faces at him.

I'd like to take credit for all these things but it really was a joint effort, I'm sure there's loads of other crap he's put up with over the years but it escapes me now. God I hope we get another cool manager.